


why'd you only call me when you're high?

by daddymichaelis



Category: Kuroshitsuji | Black Butler
Genre: AU, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Angst with a Happy Ending, Drug Use, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-01-24
Updated: 2016-11-16
Packaged: 2018-03-08 21:48:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,462
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3224636
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/daddymichaelis/pseuds/daddymichaelis
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Baby, baby, come back,” he slurred, swaying to him and wrapping his arms around his waist. “Why're you so mad, baby?”  He nuzzled his head in Ciel's hair, sighing at just how soft it felt. His fingers trailed up to his cheek, stroking it gently. “Nn, so soft.. You're so soft..”</p>
<p>“God, were you drinking too? You're really disgusting.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

“Don't fucking touch me!”

Ciel stomped away, his boots echoing off brick and cement. It was cold outside, so cold he almost considered putting on his leather jacket, but, fuck, _Sebastian called him_ and he didn't have the time to wait (or think) before hurrying to the parking lot behind their school.

“Baby, baby, come back,” he slurred, swaying to him and wrapping his arms around his waist. “Why're you so mad, baby?” He nuzzled his head in Ciel's hair, sighing at just how _soft_ it felt. His fingers trailed up to his cheek, stroking it gently. “Nn, so soft.. You're so soft..”

He bristled at the touch, prying his arms from him. “Because you're fucking high again!” He spat, turning to look at him angrily. The teen looked so in bliss, so comfortable, that he almost wanted to forget the whole thing again and curl up in his arms. But it was the fourth fucking time Sebastian's done this to him after ignoring him for days, he should know by now that he only calls him when he's high, but Ciel hardly cares.

“Let's stop being angry.” Sebastian merely enveloped him in his touch again, kissing his face. “Let's be happy. We're together and I love you very, very much. I love you more than the stars adore the moon, Ciel, you're so so so beautiful...” He pulled away from his face and stared at him dreamily. Leaning in, he kissed his lips softly. He made a childish noise in disappointment as Ciel pulled away right then.

“God, were you drinking too? You're really disgusting.”

Sebastian was clinging to his sweater like a baby, gripping him tightly. “Don't say those mean words.. You're the one with metal in your face..”

Ciel's eyebrow was pierced, along with snakebites and his nose. “And you're the one who's fucking drunk  _and_ high, calling me at three in the fucking morning just to do the same bullshit again,” he snapped, his upper lip curling as he stared at Sebastian in distaste.

Sebastian was too busy staring at a rock near his feet. He stooped down and picked it up, turning it over and over in his hands, looking up at Ciel almost excitedly. “You feel this? Feels so weird...” He held it out to Ciel, grasping one of his hands and pulling him to touch the rock. “You know?” However, he immediately lost interest in it once he touched the younger's skin. He dropped it, shuffling closer to him, running his fingers across his wrists and snaking up his sweater sleeves.

“I don't tell you enough, baby, that you're so fucking sweet.” Sebastian brought his hand up, stroking his cheek with the backs of his fingers. “I don't tell you how much I love you.. I'm sorry for being an asshole. But, fuck, Ciel Phantomhive, I love you so fucking much, y'know? You're everything that I need and oh my god...” He giggled. “I wanna marry you when we grow up.”

“Stop, Sebastian,” Ciel said softly, letting him touch him lightly. “You aren't thinking straight.”

“How am I s'posed to think straight when I'm around you? You're like a drug, and I can't get enough of being with you.”

Ciel's lips trembled, both from the cold and from the desire to give in and stop being angry. He looked up at Sebastian, who was gazing at him prettily. Giving a sigh, he pulled his hand from his cheek, holding it tightly. With his free hand, he pulled out his phone and checked the time.  _3:47 AM._ “Let's go back to my house until you calm down,” he said softly, not being able to stop himself from smiling slightly as Sebastian beamed and cheered quietly.

The older eagerly laced their fingers together as he took off in the direction of Ciel's house, pouting when Ciel tugged him back and scolded him for not acting normal enough.

“How 'm I s'posed to act normal?” He asked, the alcohol in his system beginning to _really_ kick in. “'M so happy! I have you, 'nd we get to go to your hooouuse.. So happy.”

Ciel rolled his eyes, walking beside him, squeezing his hand whenever his steps would sway.

“Look, look, Ciel,” he said, elbowing his side. Using his free hand, he pointed across the street to another boy walking down the sidewalk. “Where d'you think he's goin'?”

“I don't know. It's none of our business, anyway. Come on, we're almost home.” Ciel didn't want anyone from school seeing them like this, with Sebastian the way he was, it was almost guaranteed he'd out them.

“I mean... It's soo late, y'know? Why're people outside when it's so cold?” Sebastian continued on with a giggle, his thumb stroking the back of Ciel's hand. He craned his neck and rested his head against Ciel's, turning and breathing in his scent. “Smell so good. I ever tell you that?”

He managed to get Sebastian home without incident. “Shh,” he told him as they walked in, closing the door behind them. “Mom and Dad's asleep.” Ciel pulled him up the stairs, cringing at our loud their boots sounded.

Sebastian giggled quietly, running his fingers across the wall as he walked in to Ciel's room. He collapsed on his bed, sighing in contentment at the scent and feel of the comforter. He kicked his shoes off, closing his eyes.

Ciel climbed on the bed and let out a quiet sigh. He brushed Sebastian's hair back from his face, not feeling in the least bit amused when he giggled again, looking up at him with adoring and hazy eyes.

“Ciel?”

“Yes?”

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im sry,,,for not updating this in like 2 years,,,,,

The older was quiet for a few moments,  simply staring up at him, giving a happy sigh. "I love you." Sebastian scooted up to rest his head on Ciel's lap, letting his eyes slide shut once more. He turned onto his side, burying his face in his stomach. "I really, really, really, really, really love you lots," he murmured, his arms raising to wrap around his waist and hold tight. 

He didn't know what to do in response. He didn't want to give Sebastian what he wanted, but when the other was being so sweet and affectionate, it made it hard to not give in. "You don't seem to show it unless you're high out of your mind," Ciel said in reply, hesitantly resuming running his fingers through Sebastian's soft hair. 

"Mm." Sebastian leaned into Ciel's hand eagerly, he loved feeling his little fingers comb through his locks, it was so soothing and calming. "Hard to show it when I'm not."

Ciel stared down at him, brows furrowed as he thought. "You can't just keep doing this."

"Doing what?" Bloodshot eyes opened, and he tilted his head to the side to stare up at Ciel lazily.

"You can't ignore me when you're sober then suddenly act like you're in love with me once you start getting drunk and high."

Sebastian  gave a quiet sigh, nuzzling against Ciel's stomach. He gave the boy's waist a squeeze, biting his lip. "Sorry." He was starting to sober up now. "I really do love you. Wanna marry you and spend the rest of my life with you. I do, I do, I do." He slid his hands up the back of his shirt, gently rubbing and grazing over his skin. 

The boy's cheeks reddened when Sebastian touched his skin, his back arching a bit as he squeaked in surprise. "Then- Then you'll... You'll have to start actually showing it."

He grinned then and giggled childishly, slowly sitting up, ignoring the way the room was spinning. Sebastian leaned in and pressed their lips together, humming happily. If Ciel wanted him to show him how much he adored him, then he gladly would! He loved his best friend so much, he'd do anything for him, and, even though being affectionate and kind was hard to him when he was sober, he decided he would try his hardest to do so. Ciel wanted him to, and he wanted to make Ciel happy. 

Sebastian pushed the boy to lay back, kissing him eagerly, one hand sneaking up the front of his shirt and resting on his stomach. 

"Seb..." Ciel didn't mean to start showing it _now._ "Sebastian, stop..." He turned his head away, giving a shaky breath. He wasn't ready for this. He wanted an actual relationship with Sebastian before letting him pin him down and fuck him senseless. 

He frowned when he was told to stop, pulling away just a bit to look down at him. "What? You wanted me to prove it, didn't you, baby?"

"I want you to prove it by being responsible for once," he replied, propping himself up on his elbows as he looked up at Sebastian. "I want you to be sober and to actually be my boyfriend. Not just.. Whatever this is."

Sebastian bit his lip and sat back on his knees, staring down at his lap. This was what Ciel wanted. This was what Ciel wanted. If he wanted to keep this vibrant, passionate, beautiful boy in his life, this is what he would have to do. And it would certainly be worth it, he knew that without a doubt.

"Okay." He looked up to Ciel and smiled a bit, not noticing his subconscious swaying in an attempt to remain still in a seemingly moving room. "I... I want that, too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yeah i wanna keep doing this but i have no idea whats happenin so hopefully ill think of something  
> pls leave me praise it gives me motivation to keep goin  
> \--  
> whoreos420.tumblr.com  
> crowofhell.tumblr.com


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yaaa buddy u know we got that update!!!!!!

And, even though Sebastian said that, things returned to normal the next morning. He was in the front hall, surrounded by friends who snickered when Ciel came up and tried to talk to Sebastian, only to receive a glance from the corner of his eye and a raise of the brows, before resuming his conversation with his closest friend. 

The boy’s heart jumped into his throat. He should’ve known better when Sebastian agreed to be his boyfriend. Even still, with it being completely his fault for expecting a nearly eighteen year old to be responsible for  _ once in his goddamn life _ , Ciel still felt anger rising and swelling in his belly, his small hands clenching to fists so tight his knuckles were white. Sebastian had brushed him off, but he didn’t move from where he stood. He wasn’t going to let this slide. He would hold Sebastian to this as long as it took to make the older own up to his words.

“Sebastian Michaelis.” Ciel’s voice was loud and commanding, and everyone in the group turned to stare at him in shock. No one had expected a boy that barely came up to the middle of their chests to be able to make such a loud noise. 

Sebastian tensed. He must have forgotten something again. That always happens, and he didn’t understand why Ciel was angry, but he already wanted this to just be over. 

“Sebastian Michaelis,” the younger repeated somehow even louder, short arms crossing over his chest determinedly. When the teen in question finally sighed softly and turned to look at him, he went on to say, “You made a promise to me.”

“Ciel…” He sighed once more. “Can’t this wait until after school?” Or just anytime aside from when he was surrounded by his very popular friends.

Part of the boy wanted to agree and just wait, but the rest of him was absolutely tired of bending over backwards to do whatever Sebastian wanted. “No. We’re going to talk about it right now.” 

Sebastian swore he was going to blush in embarrassment. “Excuse me,” he said with a nervous smile to those popular friends, before taking Ciel by the arm and pulling him aside. “What’s your fucking problem?” His voice was no more than a low hiss, nose wrinkled and brows furrowed, lips turned in a frown. He had no interest in this. His head pounded from last night- he had drank more than usual and he felt like he was dying now- and Ciel’s yelling just made it worse.

“Well-”

The older immediately cut him off with a shake of his head. “ _ Jesus,  _ keep your voice down.”

Ciel continued on, voice as loud as ever, “-you agreed to be my boyfriend, yet you’re still brushing me off like I don’t matter. And I’m not going to let you walk all over me. If I’m your boyfriend, then I’ll be treated like a priority. Not just someone you talk to when you get too high to think properly.”

He stared at Ciel in surprise. He’d never expected for the boy to say something like that, or for  _ himself  _ to say something like that. He supposed he really was an idiot when he was drunk. “Can we please talk about this after school?” He asked, just a little bit of desperation clear in his voice. Sebastian needed time to think about this. Was this really what he wanted? Not just when he was drunk and high out of his mind, but when he was fully sober, was this really what he genuinely wanted?

Sebastian watched Ciel, gnawing on the inside of his cheek. He was rather attractive, and his stubborn personality was interesting, to say the least, perhaps dating him wouldn’t be so bad.

When the boy caught Sebastian’s eyes on him, his cheeks colored a rosy pink. He remembered last night, the way the older pushed him into the bed and kissed him, how his hand roamed his skin. His blush worsened, and he couldn’t meet Sebastian’s eyes any longer, instead staring at the ground. “Fine. Wait for me outside.” Ciel turned on his heel and walked away, heading to his first class. Sebastian’s gaze traveled lower, and he found himself distracted for a few moments, before his friends called him back over to their group.

The rest of the day, Sebastian was more distracted than usual in his classes. Normally, Ciel only came to mind when he was unbearably lonely, but now, he couldn’t seem to get rid of the boy’s presence in his thoughts.

Once the bell rang and school was finally over, he waited outside for Ciel at the front doors, idly toying with a loose string on his left backpack strap. The boy walked up to him and jerked him from his thoughts. 

They walked to Ciel’s house in silence.

Once they were almost there, Sebastian looked up from the sidewalk, and instead stared at Ciel, watching the way the sun lit up his eyes, how the wind brushed his hair from his face, how he hummed softly under his breath as he walked. The boy’s sun-lit eyes glanced to Sebastian’s, and his pale cheeks were a red instead when he noticed how he was staring.  
No, Sebastian decided then, looking back to the fallen leaf-covered ground, he wouldn’t mind dating him one bit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> alrighty we got chapter four in the making folks expect that soon and i hope u liked this installment 
> 
> sleepieboy.tumblr.com


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